NOPE—BUT TEENS WANT ROCKET SLEDS. OR THE CLOSEST FACSIMILE! A LITTLE BEFORE MY TIME (BORN IN 1957) BUT STILL FUN TO SEE!
The evil big-box stores have already stocked their aisles with back-to-school items, an affront to all American children, trying their durndest to enjoy the apex of global warming seasons. As a parent of a teen, my days of purchasing Elmer’s Glue and huffing markers and dull scissors are over, but we’re still expected to pony up for supplies. Evidently, $7000 in property taxes on a mighty modest home does not cover Kleenex.
To all this mid-summer school rigmarole, I at least ask the makers of supplies to look backwards for inspiration, and not to the future. This ad makes education positively dreamy.
Let’s not forget that Donny nor David would give you the time of day if you weren’t svelte. Lace stockings look gauche on thicc (yes, thicc) thighs.
But what if you’re too thin, and you need to bulk up? Simply sport a Hugh Downs jacket!
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