The trouble with baked beans,
Is undigested proteins…
Tend to collect
As you’d expect,
Unless extra enzymes do their thing.
(Like BEANO)
–
Do you know why church seats are pews,
Carefully add up the clues…
Saturday beans
Provide the means,
If one eats many or phew!
–
These days, pineapple enzymes,
Are known to decrease gas lines…
Better fresh
Uncooked, I suggest,
Wise practice for those more refined!
–
–Jonathan Caswell
MOXIE, that grand old stuff,
Had sales enough…
To beat out COKE–
It was no joke–
But the market was getting tough!
–
Looking at advertising,
Differences not surprising…
Conservative dressed
Were MOXIE’S best,
Respectfully advising!
–
COKE went for the kill,
Featured women less clothed or still…
Actively
Suggesting MOXIE
Was for the older or ill…!
–
COKE offered an active life,
Excitement with COKE was rife…
Barely dressed pretty women
MOXIE’S market dimming,
MOXIE, once strong, lost the fight!
–
–Jonathan Caswell
We threw out the last “bullets”,
We took to hitting with mallets…
Baked beans gone hard
Good and charred,
Throw them out and reuse your talents!
–
We have bacon and stuff,
Stretching dollars–beans we can stuff…
Especially filling
When poor and willing,
Pineapple make it less rough!
–
Won’t those beans go dry,
Maybe what happened last time…?
Eating good beans
Warms good dreams,
And if you need space–let them fly!
–
–Jonathan Caswell
Hearing ambulance sirens
Close by our environs…
Holiday times tough
Because not enough,
Visits or family inquiring.
–
At our place ambulances come,
Near every other week for some…
More when lonely
Knowing the only
Events are in Common Room fun.
–
Alone in a room,
Nobody coming by soon…
Why take care
With no one there,
Waiting for death to come soon?
–
This Thanksgiving Day,
Turkey dinners for those who stay…
While I’m at work
My wife’ll help twerk,
The spirits of those left alone that Day!
–
Our neighbor, Dianne is cooking
A turkey or two–others looking–
To stuffing and sides
Maybe less “red truck” rides,
And dessert for any not working!
–
–Jonathan Caswell
Pasta with home-baked beans,
A way to combine proteins…
Producing less gas
The combined repast,
All he needs is to eat more greens!
–
He went too fast in food stoking,
Stopping for a fit of choking…
Must better chew
His food or it’s true,
He’ll require some life-saving poking!
–
If one is deceased and they ask it,
What made him choke his last fit…
Pasta and beans
Were the fatal means,
With which he was put in a casket!
–
–J.E.C.
🙂
(An Opinion Piece!)
Another long weekend,
Of revised historic trends…
Curriculum
That keeps kids dumb,
Means shifting dates no end!
–
Most just like the day off,
At Italians discovering they scoff…
Nuances lost–
Such is the cost–
Of fine education gone soft!
–
Every other holiday
Has meaning stripped this way…
Manipulation
Truth is under the gun ,
While the ones responsible slip away.
–
–Jonathan Caswell
As of ten o’clock this morning ’twas here,
Ending of summer for this year…
The picnics you knew
And the hotdogs chewed,
And friends bring memories’ cheer.
–
Remember when old and grey,
Bittersweet feelings today…
More coats–no bikinis–
Autumn weather, harvest gleanings–
Perhaps a good time by the bay?
–
Green turning brown,
Halloween candy’s around…
Colorful days
In cooling haze,
Thanksgiving…soon inbound!
–
–Jonathan Caswell
Christian churches are less filling (?)
And don’t always taste that great…
Especially if unwilling
To fully participate.
–
We find the church’s feeding
Spiritual food to members gets thin…
When it’s watered down to please
Them that eat pablum!
–
Those of us with illness
May stay home to rest..
In terms of variety
Christian TV is best.
–
Not assembling together
With real, live people lacks…
Warm people helping each other,
When one needs to get down to brass tacks!
–
–Jonathan Caswell
You know he cannot last
Without some kind of repast…
Beef and bean
In a plastic tureen,
Some of you looking aghast!
–
Burrito was combined,
With fresh baked beans of mine…
Lasagna with cheese
Dwelt underneath,
After anti-gas pills, it was fine.
–
Got coffee from down the hall,
He knew he’d drink it all…
Water iced
Then sufficed,
Answered his dinner bell call!
–
–J. E. CASWELL
Burritos I have lots of,**
Good thing,’cause them I love…
Pineapple as well
For biogas quelled,
So being nearby won’t be tough!
–
–Jonathan Caswell
**Chimichanga…actually!
By the Mighty Mumford 