ON DRIVING–SARCASM

On my way to work an entrance lane

So often becomes a pain…

What do folks intend

When the KNOW it must end,

Clear signage they’re ignoring again!

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One or two actually try passing,

One tells by the speed they’re amassing…

Sneaking by on the right

Close enough to cause fright,

From the car model, they are typecasting.

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Some act like it’s the exit ahead,

Common sense in this world appears dead…

Several car-lengths along

Do the realize they were wrong?

I don’t think it enters their heads!

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Speaking of turn signals going,

Today a driver was slowing…

Ignored the exit ramp

SPED UP with winking lamp,

Merged into traffic not knowing?

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One is tempted to make wisecracks,

Driver’s iicenses in Cracker Jacks…?

In the box as a prize–

Do they not see with eyes–

Thank the Lord the route has no railroad tracks!

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–Jonathan Caswell

BALDWIN SISTERS

If you watched THE WALTONS,

You know the Baldwin sisters…

They held an innocent charm around–

But their “formula” would cause blisters (in paint!)!

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Neither sister drove at all,

So Grandpa made money…

Driving the sisters around

To earn enough to treat his honey!

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Baldwin sisters so have I,

But an unmatched dual…

If these two were very real

They’d run on diesel fuel.

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Hard to say what I’ll do—

Paint one or the other…

Maybe I’ll take them home,

Naming one after Mother!

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Collecting all these engines–

Ihope I see each run…

Piling them up on a shelf

Isn’t that much fun!

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–Jonathan Caswell

A.C. LAUD

We laud the gift to mankind,

(We’ve Air Conditioning in mind)…

Comfortable air

Cooling off in there,

Refrigeration on the fly!

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–J.E.C.

CHANGING TREE TANKA

CHANGING TREE TANKA

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Colors start to pop,

Trees shut down their leaves’ supply…

Green leaves turn colors:

Morphology is working

Just the same in ev’ry year!

–J.E.C.

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People come from far

And near…”peeping” foliage…

Brighter is better:

Bus loads come en mass to shop.

Local business harvests crops!

–J.E.C.

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A final push all

Benefit from folderol…

Festivals light skies:

Candied apples and brown bread

Folks ready for winter dead.

–J.E.C.

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Railroad excursions,

Northeast woodland incursions…

Train cars filled with joy:

Steam or diesel pull the trains,

Nostalgic commerce makes gains!

–Jonathan Caswell

FORD FOCUS-POCUS

FORD FOCUS-POCUS

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A Ford Focus to rent,

It’s timing was heaven-sent…

Had to park,

Find things in the dark,

Like where was the headlight locus?

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Confirmed things in daytime,

Some lights had no reason or rhyme…

Dome reading lamps

Gave me cramps,

Keeping them on was a crime!

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Took the car back thee next day—

Maybe the dealer knew the way..

.It was connected

To the dash light switch detected,

The dealer knew what buttons to play.

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–Jonathan Caswell

INSPECTION BLUES

THEM CAR INSPECTION BLUES

(tune of “WINNSBORO COTTON MILL BLUES”)

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Last year it took six hundred bucks,

If we didn’t have it was out of luck,

I hear a hanger in back has gone

The exhaust pipe rumbles when I turn the car on!

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I have the Blues

I have the Blues,

I have those Car Inspection Blues!

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Costs so much to drive these days,

Paycheck goes only so many ways—

Looks like we’d better start to fund-raise!

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The Shop can do it all for us,

Fix and inspect in one stop, a plus,

Pay those rising labor costs

We can’t make a living if the car is lost!

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I have the Blues,

I have the Blues,

I have those Car Inspection Blues!

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Every year gets more involved,

Sweating till each problem is solved,

Don’t you love how our state government’s evolved?

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–Jonathan Caswell

FEAR INFLATED

FEAR INFLATED

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Stories of manhood

Working on the car…

We used to do nearly everything

But that’s the way things are.

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From mists of the distant past

Told with grim emotion…

One tire inflated too far, too fast

Resulted in explosion!

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The guy doing the inflating

Was tossed side and died…

Every time I inflate a tire

I see that in my mind’s eye,

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I’m fearful that the same

May one day occur with me…

Over-inflating a slow-leak tire,

Could I be blown to eternity?

–Jonathan Caswell