Category Archives: humor

WARM YOGURT

WARM YOGURT

Warm yogurt starts to tingle,

As buggies within start to mingle…

And before long

They’ll break out in song,

Singing the company’s jingle!

–Jonathan Caswell

POET’S HAIKU

POET’S HAIKU

World concerns brought forth

Who really listens or cares

Profit selling wares!

–JEC

Jesus died for all

Not all will come to be saved…

Everyone must choose!

–JEC

Blending words to fit

Intimate, growing ideas…

Poetry lives on!

–JEC

Softer words appear,

Thinking of a real-live doll,

Hugable by me!┬á ­čÖé

–Jonathan Caswell

HERBICIDE TROUBLE IN N SCALE

HERBICIDE TROUBLE IN N SCALE

(Tune: THE YELLOW ROSE OF TEXAS)

I bought a model railroad car

For the memoriy

Of a New York shortline

Meaningful to me…

And then I found out that

The one shipper it had

Produced a herbicide that was

Found environmentally bad!

I bought an N scale

“Stauffer Chemical” railroad car,

But am afraid to run it

Don’t want to start a war..,.

N scale protesters are as fierce

As the full-sized ones I’ve heard,

I wouldn’t want my model folk

To say those nasty words!

No wonder in the seventies

That railroad went away,

For environmental damages

Someone should always pay…

If they served a dirty coal mine

They might still have a prayer,

‘Cause the latest in smoke scrubbers

Might just have saved the air!

Oh, the Skaneateles Shortline

Was a favorite railroad,

Down to one last shipper

Their existance was owed…

But that shipper produced herbicide

Found emvironmentally bad,

The only reminder I could buy

May get scale people mad!

I may just reletter the car

To use it for flyash,

Proper use of recycling

No scale people can bash…

Or maybe it will sit it out

In lonely display,

Or it’ll run to an incinerator

To burn the stuff away.

–Jonathan Caswell

(ebay)

FUR-BRAINED FELINES

FUR-BRAINED FELINES

You Tube compilations

Of cat concentrations…

Mirrors and jumps

And into bath dumps,

Expose tintinnabulations!

–Jonathan Caswell

END-OF-DAY HAIKU

END-OF-DAY HAIKU

Forecast warm, sunny,

Workplace: energized hub-bub…

Hallways empty fast!

–Jonathan Caswell

SALAD AND BROCCOLI–RAW, RAW, RAW!

SALAD AND BROCCOLI–RAW,RAW,RAW!

(or nearly so)

I ordered Broccoli and Beef,

The broccoli part was chief…

Ingredient

And chewing went

Well considering my teeth!

Reminded me of my Dad

And the chopped-up salad he had…

Which he barely chewed,

His puree’ he viewed

With words that sounded so sad!

–Jonathan Caswell

JONATHAN–YOUR LIGHTS…!

JONATHAN–YOUR LIGHTS…!

Came home from service and shopping,

Took groceries in without stopping…

Sat down to lunch

Then slept a bunch,

Had some ice cream without topping.

My wife woke me up and said,

Mike asks could you come from bed…

Your car lights are on,

Is the battery gone–

I put shorts on and fled!

It sat where I’d unloaded,

Flashers still on…bestowed it…

With sighs of releif

That it started was chief

Answer to prayer as I stowed it!

–Jonathan Caswell

STIR NOT UP LOVE OUT OF ITS TIME

STIR NOT UP LOVE OUT OF ITS TIME!

(Opinion, based upon Song of Songs 2:7)

Song of Solomon two: seven,

Reminding of the right time for heaven…

Out of context

Is frustrating sex,

Add reason to loaves with leaven.

Sing and dance while you’re young,

Older folks, more foolishly done…

Appointed seasons

Make good reasons

Accepting you are also-run!

Pressure without outlet

Just how stupid we get…

Romance out of time

Invites inner grime

When we are told, “NYET!”.

–Jonathan Caswell

CREATIVE COMBINATIONS (FROM A DREAM?)

CREATIVE COMBINATIONS

(From A dream?)

One against three or two,

How does one know what to do…

A fevered pitch

Drops a stitch,

One less working–boo-hoo!

Several combine as one,

Knowing by heart what’s done…

Sounds like a breeze,

Becomes a tight squeeze

When the word race is won.

Not sure what to do?

Will set things up for you!

Summon a meme,

Float that trireme*

Just when you’re feeling blue!

–Jonathan Caswell

* A trireme…afloat!

(http://academic,brooklyn.cuny,edu/classic/)

A CORDUROY SKIRT & JACKET

A  CORDUROY SKIRT AND JACKET

(sing to THE YELLOW ROSE OF TEXAS)

A corduroy jacket

And skirt are going to be

The next sewing project

My love does, you see…

She’ll make it from material

That cost a lot of “dough”

But I do like the pattern

And will love her in it so!

Oh, the patterned blue fabric,

A fancy corduroy…

Is worth the glow in her eyes

When I paid for this joy;

She’ll have her new sewing machine

Which I guess I’ll set up too,

And help her with the making of

Until the set is through!

We can’t afford to hire help

Except for a tip or two,

This pattern cost a lot to get

But she’s not feeling blue…

Except to say my illness brought

Her project to a halt,

Just taking over for her love

She did not find me fault.

My BLUE SAPPHIRE OF JOHNSBURG (see Archives!)

Is the best one for me,

She takes up the slack I bore

And responsibility…

The least I can do for my love

Is allow a corduroy bolt,

To help her smile a good long while

And scamper like a colt!┬á ­čśÇ

–Jonathan Caswell