Category Archives: not as smoothly

HAREM SCARE’EM AND ME!

HAREM SCARE ‘EM AND ME !

(To the tune of “THE YELLOW ROSE OF TEXAS”…A SONG)

He thought he’d like a harem–

Oh, what a great idea–

Collecting beautiful women

For each day of the year…

Have one of every hair color:

Of red-heads, two or three,

Some that change with the season

Oh what a company!

But modern girls aren’t like the ones

That lived in olden time,

They’re much more educated,

Don’t easily resign…

Their lives and their futures

To a fat cat jailer-king,

To volunteer they’d like to hear

His cash disbursement ring.

Logistics would be maddening

Even if all were convinced,

Coming from all over

When he saw the bill he winced…

He began feeling outnumbered

Cooperation thin,

Instead of coming one-by-one

They all came after him!

He couldn’t pay their wages

So all up and left,

His fine plans for his evenings–

Not a single one was kept…

And then he got the bills for

The leaving of each one,

He decided then and there

Modern harems were no fun!

I thought of the same thing myself,

Like “THE HAREM OF BIRDS”

But only beautiful bloggers–

Women, in other words…

An exclusive club with just one man

My wife would veto fast,

My flesh already wants control—

The concept sounds a blast.

But thinking realistically

My cost is way too much,

I’ll lose those friends who cannot stand

A married man’s touch…

Long-distance relationships

Are harder to maintain,

I’d just as soon give up now

Before I feel the pain!

–Jonathan Caswell

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ADMITTING MY SIN

ADMITTING MY SIN

(As part of the problem)

Tool of the devil may be,

But much of the evil’s from me…

Promises broken

E’en by a token,

From motives done selfishly.

Got back on Ebay

And spent in other ways…

Bank’s in a hole–

Sin takes a toll–

Leaving him in a haze.

With God’s help worked through

And out of his boiling hot stew…

Enough to see

Eternity

Depends on sin confessed, too!

–Jonathan Caswell

AN EARTH DAY TRILOGY

AN EARTH DAY TRILOGY

(of political and ecological opinion)

Presidents using Air Force One

Must consider ecology dung…

Florida trips

For Republican rips,

Shows where his heart’s clung.

On the Washington Mall,

Earth Day parties shared it all…

Consciences seared,

The movement’s gone weird,

The way they left things appalled!

Put trash out the night before

Helps strong winds litter more…

Why people do

Clean up after you,

You don’t pay enough for the chore!

–Jonathan Caswell

(Ideas from news items heard on local radio)

SALAD AND BROCCOLI–RAW, RAW, RAW!

SALAD AND BROCCOLI–RAW,RAW,RAW!

(or nearly so)

I ordered Broccoli and Beef,

The broccoli part was chief…

Ingredient

And chewing went

Well considering my teeth!

Reminded me of my Dad

And the chopped-up salad he had…

Which he barely chewed,

His puree’ he viewed

With words that sounded so sad!

–Jonathan Caswell

NEW ANTI-VIRUS

NEW ANTI-VIRUS

A new KASPERSKY scan,

It’s not as smooth as planned…

Rebooted so much

I think it’s a crutch,

A kind of download on demand.

The screen picture looks faded,

This eye strain has me jaded…

Not so at home

Working alone,

Up until now that’s where I’ve skated!

–Jonathan Caswell